Over twenty years ago, a friend of mine taught me the best way to hug.
She was picking me up to take me to a sweat lodge (an experience I promise to share with you in a different post).
When she showed up at my door, I gave her a hug.
“Oh no no, I need another hug.”
“But a proper hug”, she said outstretching her arms.
I thought maybe she meant a longer one, or a tighter one that includes a good squeeze, or one of those hugs that makes you utter a squishy sound like, “uwhhh uwh uwh wuhhhh”.
But she just looked at me simply and said, “I learned this from a Shaman. Tilt a little to your right.”
So, I did.
Then she did the same.
This meant my left arm was up – the opposite of what I usually do since I’m right handed.
She said, “You should hug ‘heart to heart'”.
So I pushed my heart against hers, and she was right.
It felt nice.
Like a “real” hug.
I’ve never forgotten it.
Plus, it puts an end to the whole “which way do I lean” question when two people are coming in on each other.
I just always lean a little to the right.
I’ve also learned it helps to exhale when you do it. That allows you to sink into it.
It’s so simple, yet I never realized before then what a hug really was – a meeting of the hearts.
Try it often.
Heart to heart.